Once it was established in 2012 that the world, in fact, wasn’t going to end, I realized that I was going to have to start graduating.
It was coming close to getting my second degree in childcare, and I had plans, guys. I was going to draw on all my loves of art and writing, and tie it into my golden, sun-drenched nostalgia of childhood in the 90s. I was going to be Miss Honey. I was going to be Mary Poppins. I was going to be all the coolest members of The Babysitters’ Club (Claudia and Dawn, obviously) all rolled into one.
It was going to be great, guys. It was going to be perfect.
Fast-forward to where I am now. Do you know who I became instead?
I’m the girl that convinced an entire classroom to address her as Khaleesi (pronounced Lee-see) when her host teachers refused to introduce her by name.
I’m the girl that plays lullaby versions of Metallica and Queen during naptime.
I’m the girl that taught her preschoolers to tell each other to go find their chill when they needed to calm down.
I’m the girl that tells her kids that the classroom pet fish is a Russian spy that tells me if they don’t listen to their supply teachers.
I dress exclusively in black. I let them practice their zipper and lacing skills on my leather motorcycle boots. I don’t know how to braid hair. I do know how to apply stickers so they can be tattoos. I put them in time-outs. I have very high expectations of my kids, and don’t reward them when they meet them.
And you know what?
I’m their favourite goddamn teacher. Every time.
WHERE TO GO FROM HERE
Personally, I suggest starting with the Glossary and the FAQ. A lot of the posts will make a lot more sense to you that way.
From there, you can check out the Stories tag for Real Shit That Has Actually Happened In Your Girl’s Career, and yes, you should be cringing for me.
Or, you can check out the Resources tag for information on how I think we can band together to do this crazy child-rearing sh*t without becoming a Stepford Wife or a member of The Babysitters’ Club.